Himpunan Fatwa Tentang "couple"

COURTING BEFORE MARRIAGE (Madresa MASEEHUL-ULOOM)

Another form of contact between non-mehram male and
female is the common practice of courting between the boy and
his fiance. It must be well understood that this form of liaison is
haraam.

Almighty Allah says: “Lawful to you in marriage are
chaste women from the believers.........when you have given
their due dowry, desiring chastity, not committing illegal
sexual intercourse, nor taking them as girl-friends.....” (Surah
Maa-idah, verse 5)
Elsewhere Allah Ta’~la states: “.....they (the slave-girls) should
be chaste, not committing illegal sex, nor taking boy-friends...”
These verses effectively prohibit such courtship and illicit
romance.

Islam has allowed the prospective husband to look at the face
of the girl he intends proposing to. Rasoolullah (sallallahu alayhi
wasallam) told Hazrat Mugheera bin Shu’bah (sallallahu alayhi
wasallam), when he proposed to a girl: “Look at her, for this is more
conducive to compatibility between you.” (Narrated by Tirmizhiand Nasaai, Raddul-Muhtaar)
Taking the above verses and hadeeth in conjunction, it is clear that while a man is allowed to
look at the woman proposed to, further contact is not permissible.
There is a misconception among our youth, that since the boy and
girl are engaged to be married, they may as well communicate and
court each other. Such reasoning is obviously contrary to Islam. It
appears that this false notion has been bred by the kuffar practice
of engagements, emulated so irrationally by our Muslims. Once
the couple have engaged, it seems as if they have licence to
indulge each other freely and with scant respect for hijaab. Let it
be made clear, that as long as marriage has not been contracted,
the boy and girl are still strangers (non-mehram) to each other,
hence all laws of hijaab will still apply. They are not allowed to
speak to each other telephonically or otherwise, nor to write to
each other. For this reason we encourage the nikah to be
conducted soon after the proposal has been accepted.

Reference :A study in Islamic Culture for women
Prepared and researched by
Madresa MASEEHUL-ULOOM
P. O. Box 8072
Schauderville 6060
Port Elizabeth - South Africa


Hukum Berpacaran Sebelum Kahwin ( Lembaga Fatwa Mesir )

Judul : Akhlak

Pertanyaan : Assalamualaikum... adakah seseorang itu boleh berpacaran/bercinta sebelum menikah?

Jawaban : Tidak dibolehkan berpacaran/bercinta sebelum menikah

Fatwa Dewan Fatwa

Sumber : Lembaga Fatwa Mesir, http://www.dar-alifta.org/f.aspx?ID=957907


Hukum Couple Menurut Ulama Arab

Hukum Bercouple

SETELAH memerhatikan ayat Quran dan hadis,maka tidak diragukan lagi bahawa bercouple itu haram,kerana beberapa sebab berikut:



1.Orang yang bercouple tidak mungkin menundukkan pandangannya terhadap kekasihnya.

2.Orang yang bercouple tidak akan mungkin menjaga hijab.

3.Orang yang bercouple biasanya sering berdua-duaan dengan pasangan kekasihnya,baik di dalam rumah atau di luar rumah.

4.Wanita akan bersikap manja dan mendayukan suaranya saat bersama kekasihnya.

5.Bercouple identik dengan saling menyentuh antara lelaki dan wanita,meskipun itu hanya berjabat tangan.

6.Orang yang bercouple boleh dipastikan selalu membayangkan orang yang dicintainya.



(Mesti ada salah satu daripada 6 tu pada diri kita)



Dalam kamus bercouple,hal2 tersebut adalah lumrah dilakukan,padahal satu hal saja cukup untuk mengharamkannya,apatah lagi kesemuanya atau yang lain-lainnya lagi?



Fatwa Ulama

Syaikh Muhammad Bin Shaleh al-Utsaimin ditanya tentang hubungan cinta sebelum nikah.

Jawab beliau:Jika hubungan itu sebelum nikah,baik sudah lamaran atau belum,maka hukumnya adalah haram,kerana tidak boleh seseorang untuk bersenang-senang dengan wanita asing(bukan mahramnya)baik melalui ucapan,memandang atau berdua-duaan dengan seorang wanita kecuali ada bersama-sama mahramnya,dan janganlah seseorang wanita bepergian kecuali bersama mahramnya.



Syaikh Abdullah bin abdur Rahman al-Jibrin ditanya:Jika ada seseorang lelaki yang berkoresponden dengan seorang wanita yang bukan mahramnya,yang pada akhirnya mereka saling mencintai,apakah perbuatan itu haram?

Jawab beliau:Perbuatan itu tidak diperbolehkan,kerana boleh menimbulkan syahwat di antara keduanya,serta mendorongnya untuk bertemu dan berhubungan,yang mana koresponden semacam itu banyak menimbulkan fitnah dan menanamkan dalam hati seseorang untuk mencintai penzinaan yang akan menjerumuskan seseorang pada perbuatan yang keji.Maka dinasihatkan kepada setiap orang yang menginginkan kebaikan bagi dirinya untuk menghindari surat-menyurat,pembicaraan melalui telefon serta perbuatan semacamnya demi menjaga agama dan kehormatan diri kita.



Syaikh Jibrin juga ditanya:Apa hukumnya kalau ada seorang pemuda yang belum menikah menelefon gadis yang juga belum bernikah?

Jawab beliau:Tidak boleh berbicara dengan wanita asing(bukan mahram)dengan pembicaraan yang boleh menimbulkan syahwat,seperti rayuan atau mendayukan suara(baik melalui telefon atau lain2).



Sebagaimana firman Allah SWT:Dan janganlah kalian melembutkan suara,sehingga berkeinginanorang yang berpenyakit di dalam hatinya.

(Al-Ahzab:32)



Adapun kalau pembicaraan itu untuk sebuah keperluan,maka hal itu tidak mengapa apabila selamat daripada fitnah,akan tetapi hanya sekadar keperluan.



Syubhat dan Jawapan yang Sebenarnya



Pengharaman bercouple lebih jelas dari matahari di siang hari.Namun begitu masih ada yang berusaha menolaknya walaupun dengan dalil yang sangat kukuh,antaranya:



1."Tidak boleh dikatakan semua cara bercouple itu haram,kerana mungkin ada orang yang bercouple mengikut landasan islam,tanpa melanggar syariat."



Jawapan 1:"Istilah bercouple berlandaskan islam itu cuma ada dalam khayalan,dan tidak pernah ada wujudnya.Anggap sahajalah mereka boleh menghindari khalwat,tidak bersentuhan serta menutup aurat.Tetapi tetap tidak akan boleh menghindari dari saling memandang,atau saling membayangkan kekasihnya dari masa ke semasa.Yang mana hal itu jelas haram berdasarkan dalil yang kukuh."



2."Biasanya sebelum memasuki alam perkahwinan,perlu untuk mengenal terlebih dulu calon pasangan hidupnya,fizikal,sifat,yang mana hal itu tidak akan boleh dilakukan tanpa bercouple,kerana bagaimanapun juga kegagalan sebelum bernikah akan jauh lebih ringan daripada kalu terjadi sebelum bernikah."



Jawapan 2:"Memang,mengenal fizikal dan sifat calon isteri mahupun suami merupakan satu hal yang diperlukan sbelum memasuki alam pernikahan,agar tidak ada penyesalan di kemudian hari.Namun tujuan ini tidak boleh digunakan untuk menghalalkan sesuatu yang telah sedia haram.


Title Hi, I would like to know if it's haram to have a boyfriend?(Mufti Ebrahim Desai)

Fatwa # 17542 from United States Date: Wednesday, February 18th 2009
Category

Inviting to Islam
Title
Hi, I would like to know if it's haram to have a boyfriend?, and Can you please pray for my dad to get out of jail?

Question
Hi, I would like to know if it's haram to have a boyfriend?, and Can you please pray for my dad to get out of jail?

Answer


In the name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful

Assalaamu `alaykum waRahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.

We acknowledge receipt of your enquiries and the response follows hereunder:

Fornication has become a common place occurrence within the Muslim Youth community, and the Muslim girls and boys have sadly fallen prey to the snares of Western society. In Islam, there is no such thing as a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship.

Furthermore, if a girl or boy enters into a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship then he/she is entering into a pre-marital relationship which is Haraam. We need to understand that that pre-marital relationship is like the extra-marital relationships, or what is commonly known as adultery or 'an affair'.

Islam has taken a firm and decisive stance against Zina (fornication or adultery). Allah Ta’ala commands in explicit and unequivocal words:

[وَلاَ تَقْرَبُواْ الزِّنَى إِنَّهُ كَانَ فَاحِشَةً وَسَآءَ سَبِيلاً]

“And come not near unto adultery. Verily! It is an abomination and an evil way.” (Surah Al-Israa’: Ayat 32)

Thus, Islam not only prohibits Zina, but also closes all the avenues and means leading to it. This is achieved by prohibiting every step and means leading to stimulating desires, opening ways for illicit sexual relations between men and women, and promoting indecency and obscenity.

At this stage you may assert that girlfriend-boyfriend relationships need not go as far as the sexual act; that they can control themselves and simply enjoy each others company. To counter this, you say that it is a fact when a girl and a boy are alone together, their sexual desires awaken and before they know it, they will be doing things that are not permissible between unmarried people. The reason for this is because Shaytaan will be the third person with them and he will whisper and tempt them with the forbidden.

In an authentic Hadith reported by Ahmad, it is narrated that the Prophet (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) said: “The eyes commit Zina, the hands commit Zina and feet commit Zina and the genitals commit Zina.” [Musnad Ahmad, Hadith no. 4258]

In another Hadith, he (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) is reported to have said that “the genitals confirm or deny it.” (Indicating that starring at opposite sex in a lustful way has a spontaneous effect on the genitals and may induce person to commit Zina).

Ibn Masoud (Radhiyallaahu ‘anhuma) related that Prophet Muhammad (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) said:-

«لَا يَحِلُّ دَمُ امْرِىءٍ مُسْلِمٍ يَشْهَدُ أَنْ لَا إِلَهَ إِلَّا اللهُ وَأَنَّ مُحَمَّدًا رَسُولُ اللهِ، إِلَّا بِإِحْدَى ثَلَاثٍ: النَّفْسُ بِالنَّفْسِ، وَالزَّانِي الْمُحْصَنُ، وَالتَّارِكُ لِدِينِهِ الْمُفَارِقُ لِلْجَمَاعَة»

"The blood of a Muslim may not be legally spilt other than in one of three instances: the married person who commits adultery, a life for a life, and one who forsakes his religion and abandons the community." [Sahih Bukhari & Muslim].

As for the unmarried person who has sexual relationships, rest assured that this person will not go unpunished; he or she is to be caned or whipped one hundred times:

الزَّانِيَةُ وَالزَّانِى فَاجْلِدُواْ كُلَّ وَاحِدٍ مِّنْهُمَا مِاْئَةَ جَلْدَةٍ

The adulteress and adulterer, flog each of them with a hundred stripes.(Surah Nur; ayat 2)

Even in the Hereafter, the punishment will be very severe as was attested by the Prophet (Sallallaahu ‘alayhi Wassallam) when he went in Mi’raj that the adulterers, men and women, were in a baking oven in Hellfire [Sahih Al-Bukhari].

This is why Islam shuns all avenues leading to corruption of the mind, body and soul. May Allah protect us from this evil act and guard us against all ways that lead to it.

“We pray hale and hearty that Allah Ta’ala liberates your father rapidly from the jail and keeps him with ‘aafiyah (grant him safety & wellbeing). Ameen”

Do keep in touch. If you have any other question, don't hesitate to write to us.

And Allah Ta'ala Knows Best

Wassalamu Alaykum

Mufti Ebrahim Desai (M1)
Darul Iftaa, Madrassah In'aamiyyah

my question to www.askmufti.co.za(Hukum courting/pacaran/bercinta/bercouple dan yg sewaktu dengannya)

Q.is it permissible to courting?
can you explain in very detial, so i can spread it to ummah


A. Premarital relations are not allowed in Islam. Even if there is no physical sexual relationship, it is still not permissible. The Hadeeth explains: It is narrated from Sayyidina Abu Hurayrah (Radhiyallaahu Anhu) that Rasulullah (Sallallaahu Alayhi wa Sallam) said:
Fornication (Zina) of the eyes is the gaze. Fornication of the ears is to listen. Fornication of the tongue is the speech. Fornication of the hands is to touch. Fornication of the feet is to walk, and the heart desires and hopes. The private part either confirms it or negates it. (Muslim V8 P52)
Usually an 'engagement' takes place whereby it is now confirmed that this boy and girl will marry in the near future. This engagement is not a licence for the boy and girl to have any contact; whether by meeting, by phone, email, etc. Many a time although they were engaged, they changed their minds and never married. A relationship of any type between boy and girl is only allowed after Nikah. According to Shari'ah they are 'strangers' before Nikah, notwithstanding the engagement. Whoever has a relationship (courting) before marriage, will fall under the category of the Hadeeth mentioned.
The Qur'aan says: “So marry them (women) with the permission of their families, and pay them their dowries in an equitable amount, while these women should remain chaste (before marriage), without fornicating not taking illicit friendships (i.e. boy-friends).” (Surah Nisaa, verse 25). The same theme is mentioned in two more places in the Holy Qur'aan. These verses prove that courting is Haraam.

Moulana Yusuf Laher
Checked and approved by:
Mufti Siraj Desai
Darul-Uloom Abubakr
P.O. Box 4280
Korsten 6014
Port Elizabeth
South Africa